So you know that thing you said yes to earlier this week or perhaps even today? That you actually really don’t want to do? That thing that’s going to overstretch you, eat into your downtime or perhaps you even cancelled your own plans for? Yea that!! This message is for the people that find themselves regretting their yeses more often than not and resenting themselves and others as a result. Sorry, you can’t blame others for taking advantage of you, this is on you. Your boundaries are lax. You give away your power every time you say yes when you want to say no.
We’ve all done it on occasion. (I’m totally guilty). Some more than others, unfortunately, You guys seriously need some boundaries.
I mean I get it you want to be helpful and you want to see the smile on peoples faces. to spread a little joy and feel like you’re a wonderful person. Perhaps you’ve experienced or you fear moody reactions when you say no. But are you sacrificing your own hopes and dreams and plans in the process? Perhaps it’s time to rethink the way you relate to people. Stop fearing negative responses so much that you are being unkind to yourself.
Guess what people are resilient they will survive being told no and so will you. People have other options and people will forgive you for having other plans or needing downtime. If not perhaps they need to look in the mirror. You don’t need people like that in your life or even respect them anyway. Why do things for someone you don’t even respect?
No point hoping someday the requests will shallow out and people will ask for your help less and less. They need help and you’re there go-to gal or guy because that’s what you’ve allowed them to think for so long. They won’t see if they’re getting in the way of your plans, adding to your exhaustion or fuelling a ticking time bomb… (yes you will explode eventually) they will just be used to you saying yes every time they need a favour. It’s up to you to show the world how you want to be treated. It’s not ok to keep letting yourself be walked over.
If you’re super worried that you’ll bail on yourself then practise in the mirror. It might feel stupid in the beginning but it will get easier and it’s a small price to pay for a step towards your ultimate freedom, power and liberation.
So next time someone offers you a less than wonderful way to spend your time I hope you’ll be well practiced in how to assert your new-found boundary.
Time to take back your power. Rise and Thrive. You can do this.
Share with your people-pleaser friends to help them take back their power too. Let me know your thoughts below.