Are you struggling with life and stuck between a rock and a hard place and don't know where to turn? It's ok I got you. What is something about personal power and healing trauma that you'd like to know? Ask me in the comments or drop me a line on a contact form and I'll answer in a post. I guess it's like an agony aunt type thing. Also be sure to sign up for updates so you can see when I write a follow-up post about it.
Guide to Focus and Momentum. Sometimes it's really difficult to stay focused on a task that we find boring or uninteresting and we can find ourselves procrastinating. Ok, maybe more than sometimes. I put together this guide to focus and momentum because I'm a self-proclaimed master procrastinator. I figured others probably have a similar problem so I set out to find ways to help me to put a loving pressure on myself to access my flow state when I can't seem to stay away from the distractions. What is Procrastination? Procrastination is doing something you shouldn't be doing when you know you should be doing something else. When we get distracted by every new shiny thing we give away our power. We lose the ability to reach out for and accomplish our goals. Our overall life quality is restricted when we are unable to control our awareness. Eat And Sleep…
How To Deal With Stress Stress comes and goes for most people. But some people don't have a clue how to deal with stress. It tends to linger and cause more drama than it's worth. If you hold onto your stress for long enough it can create mental health issues and even worse. So it's a good idea to have a few tools at your disposal to deal with it when it rears its ugly head. The reason we get stressed is usually that we're quite addicted to being in control. We tell ourselves a story about how this or that should be and then we get frustrated when we can't get our own way. As mature adults, we should have gained the capability of navigating stressful situations quite calmly. We should have been taught how to deal with stress as children. But unfortunately, many of us were never given…
Here's a (hopefully ever-expanding) list of inoffensive ways to say 'NO' without lying or losing your integrity. Because too many of us get caught up doing stuff we don't want to do or even things that are detrimental to us, simply because we don't know how to say No, we don't want to upset others, we don't want to seem lazy or incompetent or we don't want to miss out. Trust me. none of these carry any weight. If you learn these inoffensive ways to say no, you might never be caught out again. NoThis is a complete sentence and the more people assert their No, the more widely it will be accepted as such. No explanations just No. I think I'll pass.Thanks but no thanks.Simple yet effective. I need to rest.Needing a rest is a perfectly acceptable reason to opt-out of something. I'm gonna have to say No to…
Do you recognise the beauty of vulnerability? I bet you don't. Most of us see only weakness in our vulnerabilities. We were raised to conceal them. We were told things like wipe your eyes, don't cry, don't be a baby or be a big boy when we were hurt. But you know what? That was so limiting. We deserved better than that, we should've been taught how to release our pain and emotions not to hide away like we don't all have weaknesses and vulnerability. It is truly beautiful to get to a place where we can be so authentic that we can let our vulnerabilities shine through. It shouldn't have to be but stepping into your vulnerability is courageous. Nobody's perfect and recognising the beauty of vulnerability will help you to accept that. It's liberating to admit our inefficiencies and bring them out into the open. It can help…
Fear doesn't always just look or sound like 'oh no I'm not doing that I'm scared'. It can show itself in many ways. So here we begin to explore the ways we can uncover when we might actually be feeling fearful even if we recognise it as something else. Procrastination/ distraction/ /busywork: Wanna know why you're never getting onto that most important life-changing task? This is a big one. We are afraid of the outcome of the task. Will it be good enough? Will I be mocked or will you be humiliated? It'll probably all work out totally fine and if not you can probably handle it. But guess what you gotta take the leap and actually do it to find out. Self-criticism: You criticise yourself because others have and you're afraid they're right. You respect their point of view more than you respect your own. Accumulation: Fear of there…
So you know that thing you said yes to earlier this week or perhaps even today? That you actually really don't want to do? That thing that's going to overstretch you, eat into your downtime or perhaps you even cancelled your own plans for? Yea that!! This message is for the people that find themselves regretting their yeses more often than not and resenting themselves and others as a result. Sorry, you can't blame others for taking advantage of you, this is on you. Your boundaries are lax. You give away your power every time you say yes when you want to say no. We've all done it on occasion. (I'm totally guilty). Some more than others, unfortunately, You guys seriously need some boundaries. I mean I get it you want to be helpful and you want to see the smile on peoples faces. to spread a little joy and…
Embracing Anxiety Introducing your Anxiety So who needs a pep talk? What have you been avoiding lately? I often find myself trapped and procrastinating over the very thing I know I should be doing. Anxiety is the perpetrator but before you scowl in its direction, know this. The answer and key to healing is in embracing anxiety. Anxiety gets alot of bad press and pushing it away and complaining about things is rarely the answer to any problem. It's just a protective mechanism really. It wants you to be safe. What if I told you that your anxiety loves you? That it came to wrap you in a big warm hug and what did we do? We tried to push it away and we avoided the difficult things. Our protective barriers went up. We didn't know anxiety came to teach us some valuable lessons. So we never sought to learn…
She tried to do normal, but it was hard. It stung, it itched, it irritated the very crevices of her soul. She didn't fit in, she had no qualms admitting that. She was lost, miserable, drowning in self pity. Everything about the mundanity of everyday life overwhelmed her. She was done bending over backwards to meet the needs of others. Her back was broken. She didn't know what to do to escape the pain. She longed for a familiarity she had only ever found in one place. She had tried to find it elsewhere but never could. She didn't really want to, but she didn't feel like she had much of a choice, She quietly climbed back into her pit of despair. It was where she felt safe. It was cold and damp and lonely and quite a few sizes too small. In fact it choked her a little but…
Dear overwhelm, I know I get stressed sometimes when you're here. But I've been doing some inner work and now I totally understand why you keep showing up, I've realized it's time for me to listen because you have come to teach me valuable lessons about myself and this life. I am ready. Here's what I've learned from you lately I need to walk before I can run. It' ok to take baby steps to build up momentum on a new task, relationship or challenge. Stop taking such big bites out of life. I am not going to miss out. I can take smaller bites and what is truly for me will still be waiting for me to embrace on the other side. You've come to teach me the art of delegation and that if something needs to get done that badly it will. I don't have to take on…
The world can be a pretty bleak place if we wander around consumed by the daily grind. Perhaps we don't even realize that we have any control over our direction or circumstances. It's easy to lose ourselves in the mists of monotony. If you could choose to live in darkness or light which would you choose? You do have the choice. Have you ever considered who or what drains your power and keeps you from your true work? What even is your true work? I mean seriously we wake up every day and do what we're 'supposed' to do, as prescribed by the societal idea of Normality. We struggle and strive to meet other peoples expectations, we bend over backward to please everyone but ourselves. We tiptoe around people and their emotions so as not to touch or trigger their thorns. We get consumed by the bad news and negativity,…